Do you want an easy way to unblock chakras? Do you wish to expedite your chakra healing journey? Do you want to stop running in circles & make actual tangible progress?

If so, you are in the right place.

In this blog, you will learn how to unblock chakras by getting present to your fears. You’ll also learn how to discern which exact fear(s) are holding you back.

Fears exist at each Chakra Level

Most beginners in their Chakra Healing journey tend to associate fears with Chakra 1. That’s a rookie mistake because fears exist across all seven chakras.

A chakra is a portal of energy & consciousness. The key reason you can’t access the intelligence & consciousness of your chakras is because of chakra blockages.

Past experiences, trauma, distortions, imprints, implants, suppressed emotions, ancestral miasma & fears block our chakras from their full expression.

While you may lack awareness of specific emotions or trauma events, it is highly likely you are consciously aware of the fears holding you back. Working through your fears will also help release blocks from your chakras.

How to get Present to your Fear in your Chakras

You can intuit the fears localized in each chakra based on the location & theme of each chakra.

For example, the Root Chakra (Chakra 1) is connected with the themes of safety & security and feeling grounded in the material 3D world. So, the blockages in the first chakra level can manifest as:

• Lack of ambition & being afraid.

• Feeling insecure in your body or the world.

• And also fear of money, poverty, & being able to survive in the world.

The Sacral Chakra (Chakra 2) is connected with the core themes of Relationships, Sex/ Sexuality, Inner Child Healing, Emotions, Reproduction, Intimacy, and Instincts.

• So, the fear here can manifest as fear of relationships, intimacy, betrayal in relationships, fear of establishing boundaries with others, fear of reclaiming your sexuality, or fears around sex.
• You could be afraid to put your creative work out in the world.
• Or you could be terrified of your emotions or having emotional conflicts.
• Your relationship with your parents also impacts the functioning second chakra.
• And it is one of the hardest chakras to master.

The Solar Plexus Chakra (Chakra 3) is connected with your conscious mind, power & self-esteem.

• And so, blockages here are experienced as the fear of power.
• You could be terrified of taking on responsibility or afraid of owning who you are because of your upbringing, family, culture, and tradition.

The Hear Chakra (Chakra 4) is connected with the core theme of giving & receiving love. Heart blockages can manifest as an inability to receive love. You could be afraid of getting your heart broken. If heart diseases run rampant in your family of origin, then there could be an unconscious fear of getting a heart ailment.

The Throat Chakra (Chakra 5) is connected with speaking your truth.

Blocks in the throat chakra can manifest as fear of speaking your truth or being afraid to ask for what you want. It can manifest as the fear of public speaking. And when you do speak, your voice is frail & weak.

The Third Eye Chakra (Chakra 6) is connected with inner vision & clarity. Blocks here can manifest as fear of intuition, fear of inner wisdom, and inability to see with clarity.

The Crown Chakra (Chakra 7) is associated with spiritual guidance & connection with the celestial energies. Any blockages in the crown chakra can manifest as mistrust of the divine guidance.

Based on the information shared, consider making a list of your fears by each chakra. You might find that most fears are primarily limited to the first three chakras. Don’t be alarmed. It’s normal since we live in a 3D reality.

Fears in the 4th, 5th, and 6th chakra become self-evident when working with your soul matrix. And so, in the initial stages of your chakra healing journey, commit to healing your lower chakras.

How to get present to your fears with the 4-Body Model

Another easy way to discern your fears is with the 4-Body Model system.

According to this model, at an energetic level, humans have four bodies – Physical, Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual. When the four bodies are healthy & balanced, you tap into your authentic core self. You can learn more about the 4-Body Model system here.

You can use the 4-Body model to group your fears by the four bodies.

At the Emotional Body level, you could struggle with the fear of asking for help or the fear of anger. You could be terrified to fail, be disappointed, be judged, or feel unloved.

At the Physical Body level, you could struggle with fear of sickness or catching a virus, or there could be an unconscious fear around death/dying.

At the Mental Body level, you could struggle with the fear of the unknown or not being enough. You could also struggle mentally with letting go & surrender.

At a Spiritual Body level, there could be fear of god or the fear that god doesn’t exist.

Categorizing your fears by the 4-Body Model will again bring your fears from the unconscious into the conscious realm.

How to discern the intensity of your fears?

Once you have clarity about your fears, the next step is to discern their intensity. Meaning, on a scale of 1-10, which of your fears has a resonance of 10 & which one is at level 4?

Consider that each fear makes a distinct sound in your energy field. How the fear of failure ‘feels’ differs from the fear of asking what you want.

Your job is to tune into your body and determine how each fear ‘feels’ on the inside. Rate each fear on a scale of 1-10.

By the end of the exercise, you’ll know which fear(s) to focus on first.

How to Release Fears?

Once you have identified your fears, the next step is releasing them. Here are a few suggestions to explore:

Guided Chakra Meditation: In your daily meditation practice, you can ask your guides to release fears from each chakra. Here’s the link to a guided chakra healing meditation to get started.

Sound Meditation: In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), the Kidneys are associated with fear. By chanting & toning with the sound of ‘chewwww…’ one can connect with the soul of the kidneys. And work towards releasing fears from your energy field.

Compassionate Witnessing: If you are serious about releasing fears, you must commit to cultivating self-compassion. When you witness your pain, challenges, and fears without judgment, it changes the lens through which you perceive life. Self-criticism makes way for self-acceptance & self-love.

Through Inquiry: In your journal, reflect on questions such as, when did the fear originate? What was the need for the fear to be present? What purpose did it serve?

Cultivating Patience: Fears associated with traumatic events and early childhood experiences are deeply embedded in the subconscious mind. So, cultivating patience will help you go a long way to stay grounded in your healing journey. 

Free Downloadable Guide

Download a comprehensive list of over 150 fears most of us struggle with. This list will help you get started in discerning the fears by body levels and chakras. Grab the list here.

Summary

To recap, you learned two approaches to get present to your fears:

• #1, Exploring fears associated with the seven chakras.
• #2, Exploring fears with the 4-Body Model System.

You also learned how to discern the intensity of your fears.

Practical ways of releasing fears from your energy field & consciousness.

Other Helpful Resources

• The Four Body Model System
• Unblocking the Root Chakra
• Unblocking the Sacral Chakra
• The 7 Chakras
• Healing the Lower Chakras

Beloveds, we call forth our greater God self, the Masters and evolution support team and over lighting Angel of healing in service to light and law of the One of which we serve. 

Beloveds, please install the lattice work of light into the layers of each of the chakra systems, fully, completely and totally clearing any and all fear based programs logged there.  

We call in the platinum ray to sweep through our field, clearing and removing all imbalanced energies or imbalanced matrixes within our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual bodies.

Beloveds, as we focus on our root chakra, we ask to fully clear any and all core fears in our root chakras. 

Beloveds, please clear, heal, align, anchor, activate, synchronize, fill with light, repair and reconnect the root chakra, the root channels and the root complex.

We request that root chakra be balanced and attuned to the Krystic Ascended Master state of consciousness. 

Beloveds, let us focus on our sacral or second chakra. We request that all core fears be fully cleared and removed from the second chakra easily and effortlessly. 

Beloveds, please clear, heal, align, anchor, activate, synchronize, fill with light, repair and reconnect the second chakra, the second chakra channels and the second chakra complex.

Beloveds, we request to magnetically attune the second chakra to the Ascend Master state of consciousness.

Beloveds, as we focus on our solar plexus, our third chakra, we full request the clearing and release of all core fears from our solar plexus. 

Beloveds, please clear, heal, align, anchor, activate, synchronize, fill with light, repair and reconnect the solar plexus, the solar plexus complex and the solar plexus channels.

As we attune to the infinite power of the solar plexus of our greater god self, Beloveds, please attune the solar plexus to the Ascend Master state of consciousness.

As we place our attention on our heart center, Beloveds, we request all core fears be removed from our heart chakra. 

Please clear, heal, align, anchor, activate, synchronize, fill with light, repair and reconnect the heart chakra, the heart chakra channels and the heart complex.

We request the heart center be fully attuned to the Ascended Master state of consciousness. 

As we focus on our fifth chakra, the throat center, to align to Divine will, Beloveds, please clear and remove all core fear from within our fifth chakra. Assist us with the courage and bravery to express that truth fully aligned to the Divine will and Divine presence. 

Beloveds, please clear, heal, align, anchor, activate, synchronize, fill with light, repair and reconnect the fifth chakra, the throat center, its complex and its channels.

Beloveds, as we focus on our throat center and throat chakra, we request an attunement to spiritual will and divine purpose fully attuned to the Ascended Master state of consciousness. 

As we focus on our sixth chakra of our third eye we request all core fear be released and removed as we allow the inner vision and clarity to fully pervade our being removing all obstacles aligning to absolute clarity of oneness and union with the Divine Self.

Beloveds, please clear, heal, align, anchor, activate, synchronize, fill with light, repair and reconnect the sixth chakra, the sixth chakra complex and the sixth chakra channels.

Open all spiritual links fully and completely through the Divine Vision.

We request the full attunement of our third eye to be aligned to that of Ascended Master state of awareness. 

Beloveds, as we focus on our crown chakra, widening the crown to receive spiritual guidance and connection with the celestial energies, we request that all density and fear energies be fully cleared from our crown chakra.

Beloveds, please clear, heal, align, anchor, activate, synchronize, fill with light, repair and reconnect the crown chakra, the crown chakra channels and the crown chakra complex.

We request an attunement to the union of the Divine Self in right relationship with our brothers and sisters. Beloveds, please attune the crown to the Ascended Master state of consciousness.

Beloveds, we now request the Universal Harmonics, the tones of every octave and frequency, the dimensional time matrix, to flood our being into the unified chakra attunement. We ask for a blending of our entire chakra column to function as one unified chakra, as one unified being of light, fully aligned, fully fulfilled and fully embodied.

Beloveds, in deep love and gratitude our infinite stream of love is with you in always and so it is, we close this session.

Meditation Source

1. Giving your personal power away to other people, your subconscious mind, your negative ego, your five senses, your physical body, your emotional body, your mental body, your child consciousness, a guru, the Ascended Masters or God.
2. Loving others but not loving yourself.
3. Not recognizing your negative ego as the source of all your problems.
4. Focusing on god but not properly integrating and parenting the child within you.
5. Not eating properly and not getting enough physical exercise, which results in physical illness and limits all other levels.
6. Being deeply into the spiritual life but not recognizing the psychological level, which also needs to be understood and mastered.
7. Material desire.
8. The trap and glamour or power, and holding power over others once you become successful.
9. Becoming too ungrounded, which then has a harmful effect on one’s physical body.
10. Trying to escape earth instead of creating heaven on earth.
11. Seeing appearances instead of seeing the true reality behind all appearances.
12. Trying to become instead of realizing that you already are the Eternal Self, as is everyone else.
13. Not realizing that you are the cause of everything.
14. Serving others totally before you have become self-actualized.
15. Thinking that there is such a thing as “righteous anger” (anger is a big trap).
16. Becoming an extremist and not being moderate in all things.
17. Thinking you have to be ascetic to be spiritual.
18. Becoming too serious and not having enough joy, happiness, and fun in your life.
19. Not being disciplined and unceasingly continuing your spiritual practices.
20. Stopping your spiritual practice and studies when you get involved in a relationship.
21. Putting a relationship before self and God (this is a major trap).
22. Letting your child consciousness run your life.
23. Being too critical and hard on yourself.
24. Getting caught up in the glamour and illusion of psychic powers.
25. Owning your power but not learning to surrender to God simultaneously, or surrendering to God but not learning to own your power simultaneously.
26. Losing your personal power when you get physically tired and exhausted.
27. Expecting God and the Ascended Masters to solve all your problems.
28. Allowing yourself to go on automatic pilot and losing your vigilance.
29. Giving your power to channeled entities.
30. Reading too much and not meditating enough.
31. Letting your sexuality run you instead of mastering it.
32. Over-identifying with your mental or emotional body, and not achieving balance.
33. Thinking you need to be a voice channel or see or experience all kinds of psychic phenomena to be spiritual or ascend.
34. Forcing the raising of the Kundalini.
35. Forcing the opening of the chakras.
36. Thinking the spiritual path you have found is the “best”.
37. Judging people because of what initiation level they may be at.
38. Sharing your ‘advanced’ initiation level with other people.
39. Telling people about the ‘good spiritual work’ you are doing, instead of just being humble.
40. Thinking that negative emotions are something you have to have.
41. Isolating yourself from people and thinking that is spiritual.
42. Thinking that the earth is a terrible place.
43. Giving your power to astrology and the influence to the stars.
44. Being too attached to things.
45. Being too unattached to life, not striving for involved detachment.
46. Being too preoccupied with self and not being concerned enough about being of service to others.
47. Getting stuck in the numerous limited theories of traditional psychology, which are only a single piece of the whole human puzzle.
48. Being too much the mystic or too much the occultist and not striving to integrate the two sides.
49. Giving up amidst great adversity (this is one of the biggest traps of all – you must never give up).
50. Believing that the suffering you are going through on whatever level will not pass.
51. Focusing too much on what initiation level you are at or when you are going to ascend instead of the work that needs to be done.
52. Getting caught up in spiritual powers and then achievement of siddhas instead of recognizing that love is the most important spiritual power of all.
53. Badmouthing other spiritual or metaphysical groups, and not unifying and networking with other groups even though they may be not in total alignment with all your beliefs.
54. Getting caught up in the dogma of traditional religion.
55. Thinking you need an intermediary between you and God.
56. Using your spiritual beliefs to create separatism or elitism or undue specialness
57. Becoming too fanatical in your beliefs.
58. Believing you can achieve enlightenment through drugs or some kind of pill (this is the highest sense of illusion).
59. Believing that other people don’t have to work as hard at their spiritual path as you do.
60. Putting your relationship with your kinds before your self and God.
61. Getting caught up in all the attractions of the fascinating material world in which we live.
62. Becoming too caught up in loving one person instead of spreading your love out to encompass all people in an unconditional sense.
63. Getting caught up in duality instead of achieving even-mindedness, inner peace, and equanimity at all times.
64. Being a father or son, or a mother or daughter, in your relationships instead of being an adult.
65. Thinking you need to suffer in life.
66. Being a martyr on your spiritual path.
67. Needing to control others.
68. Having spiritual ambition.
69. Needing to be liked, loved, or approved of.
70. Needing to be the teacher.
71. Being hypersensitive or being too shielded.
72. Taking responsibility for other people.
73. Being the savior.
74. Serving for selfish reasons and thinking you are being spiritual.
75. Thinking you are more advanced spiritually than you really are, or thinking you are less advanced than you really are.
76. Blindly seeking fame.
77. Placing undue importance on finding your twin flame and soul mate and not realizing your soul and monad are, in truth, who you are really looking for
78. Thinking you need a romantic relationship to be happy.
79. Needing to be at center stage, or always choosing to be a wallflower.
80. Working too hard and becoming driven and running yourself down physically, or playing too much and not being about the Father’s business.
81. Going to psychics and channels for guidance and not trusting your own intuition.
82. Working with teachers on this plane or on the Inner Place who are not Ascended Masters and so are limited in the understanding and conception of reality.
83. Making the spiritual path an interest rather than an all-consuming fire.
84. Wasting too much time watching TV, reading trashy novels, seeing violent movies.
85. Wasting enormous amounts of time & energy because of lack of organization and proper time management.
86. Thinking that arguing with another is serving you or that person.
87. Trying to win or be ‘right’ instead of striving for love.
88. Putting too much emphasis on intuition, intellect, feeling, and instinct instead of realizing that they all need to be balanced and integrated in their proper proportions.
89. Devoting yourself to a guru who makes you smaller instead to the Eternal Self, which you are.
90. Trying to be open all the time, instead of knowing how to open and close your field as the need arises.
91. Not knowing how to say no to other people, your child consciousness, or the negative ego when the need arises.
92. Thinking violence or attacks on others in any form will get you what you want or serves God or the Ascended Masters for your problems.
93. Blaming God, or being angry at God or the Ascended Masters for your problems.
94. Thinking that if your prayers aren’t answered in the way you expect, God and the ascended masters aren’t answering your prayers.
95. Comparing yourself with other people instead of comparing self with self.
96. Thinking that being poor is being spiritual.
97. Comparing and competing with others over one’s initiation level and ascension.
98. Allowing yourself to be a victim of other people and of your physical body, emotional body, mental body, desires, five sense, or negative ego.
99. Studying too much and not demonstrating in the real world.
100. Thinking your moodiness is true reality of God.
101. Thinking your worth comes from doing and achieving things.
102. Thinking you don’t need to protect yourself spiritually, psychologically, and physically.
103. Thinking that glamor, maya, illusion, negative ego, fear and separation are real.
104. Consuming sugar, artificial stimulants, coffee, and soft drinks for physical energy.
105. Trying to do everything yourself and not calling on God for help, or constantly calling on God for help and not helping oneself.
106. Loving people a little less because they are treating you badly, or seeing a negative ego example; not differentiating the person from the behavior.
107. Losing faith in the living reality of your Soul, your Monad, God, and the Ascended Masters; they have the ability to help you if you will persevere and do your part.
108. Thinking that other people can achieve ascension, but you can’t, or at least not in this lifetime.
109. Trying to achieve ascension to escape one’s problems.
110. Thinking that earth is a prison instead of recognizing it as one of God’s seven heavens.

Source: The content has been taken from Dr. Joshua David Stone’s book on Soul Psychology.

Book Link: Soul Psychology by Dr. Stone

Do you engage in negative self-talk? Struggle with low confidence? Do you feel inadequate or not enough compared to others?

Are there situations where you reject yourself before others can reject you? Do you wish you were more kind to yourself? Do you feel stuck in a cycle of self-doubt & frustration?

If you said yes to any of these questions, then you are in the right place. In this blog post, I’ll share three negative ego programs keeping you stuck from healing the Lower Chakra.

When you heal your lower chakras, you can manage your negative thoughts & emotions. Why? Because you finally understand where your emotional pain is stemming from. Note that I said ‘manage’ your negative thoughts & emotions, and not control them.

Transcending your negative thoughts & emotions doesn’t work in the long run either. Because the underlying root cause isn’t addressed,

Lower Chakras Introduction

Chakra 1, 2 and 3 form the personality matrix, also called the Ego. The first chakra houses the Subconscious mind. The second chakra houses the Instinctual mind. And the third chakra, the Conscious mind. Together, the first three lower chakras dictate the quality of your everyday thinking.

On an average, we have both positive & negative thoughts.

Let’s call the part of the personality matrix (or ego) which gives rise to positive thoughts as the Positive Ego.

And let’s call the personality matrix giving rise to negative thoughts as the Negative Ego. When a person has an ego problem, or they have a big/inflated ego, they are operating from their Negative Ego.

What keeps you stuck in Negative Thinking

Your negative thoughts don’t appear out of nowhere. Painful experiences stored in Chakra 1 and 2 become the source of your negative thoughts.

On a typical day, your thoughts are a mix of both positive & negative thoughts. So by extension, your ego is a combination of both, positive ego & negative ego. The latter is what keeps you stuck in negative mindset & what you must heal.

It’s easier said than done. Because healing this negative ego means:

• You can no longer deny or suppress your emotional issues
• You will have to accept the negative aspects of your personality & learn to work through them

Your emotional pain exists for a reason. And it loses charge only when you stop running away from it.

Why common suggestions to let go of ego don’t work

If you were to look online on how to handle your negative thinking, you’ll come across suggestions like –

• focus on your strengths & not weaknesses
• Improve your social skills
• And the quintessential, let go of your ego & comparisons

While these are excellent suggestions, they don’t work in the long run. They don’t address the root cause of your negative thinking; which is the negative ego construct.

Healing the negative ego means healing the pain in your lower chakras, that’s the first three chakras.

An analogy for understanding negative programs running in lower chakras

Think of the lower chakras as separate software programs.

Say Chakra 1 is Abode Photoshop, Chakra 2 is MS Word and C3 is MS Excel.

If there is a bug in any of these software programs, you know these programs won’t function as designed.

Using this analogy, consider there are inbuilt bugs in our lower chakras. Every single human has these bugs unless cleared from the lower chakras. And these bugs will undermine your efforts in healing your negative ego.

Program #1

The first bug impacts the second chakra. The key themes connected with the sacral chakra are sex, sexuality, and relationships. The bug exists to perpetuate the misuse, and abuse of our sexual energies.

What keeps this bug in place is our social conditioning. For example, reflect on the blatant use of sex in advertising, and social media. The rampant availability of pornography material. The normalization of things like child abuse & trafficking, genital mutilation, and non-consensual sex.

All these factors color our perception about sexuality and give rise to:

• Sexual predators, sexual slaves & victim,
• Unhappy marriages. Because there’s a disconnect b/w your exposure and lived reality

Trauma & Abuse in their sexual relations creates blockages in the Sacral chakra. And this inherent pain keeps men & women at war with each other.

Most of us on this planet are not taught that our sexual organs are sacred.

Our sexual beliefs get formed through exposure to online forums, movies & even friends. We rarely explore what healthy sexuality entails.

Know that the Sexual Misery bug exists to siphon & manipulate your sexual energy. Sexual misery is a sensitive topic & you want to address it with tenderness & compassion.

You can heal & reclaim your sexual energies through a dedicated self-inquiry process. And in the process, neutralize this negative program running in your second chakra.

A good place to start exploration is to reflect upon questions such as:

• Where in your life – you have consented to misuse of your sexual energies?
• How has it served you?
• What must you heal in your sexual history?

Program #2

The second bug impacts the third chakra. This bug tricks you into inferiority or superiority thinking. Why can this bug manipulate you? Because of the pain logged in your emotional wounds.

Our brain processes data instantaneously, so most of us are not aware of how our thoughts come into being.

Say your spouse or boss overlook you before making an important decision. How would that make you feel? It might trigger feelings of low self-esteem, or not good enough, or even unworthiness.

Another name for Inferiority or superiority complex is Victim/ Victimizer thinking. Both of which are polar opposites & abusive to your soul. Worse, this level of thinking perpetuates the existence of the negative ego construct.

The default victim/ victimizer mindset polarizes your thoughts. Meaning, your default thinking is either good/bad, higher/lower, right/wrong, etc.

Your thoughts are no longer in harmony or neutral. And you’ll find it challenging to make space for creative ideas.

The best antidote to heal the victim/ victimizer program is to

• Become aware of your thinking from a moment to moment basis.
• Reflect on how you think, especially in charged situations.

Program #3

The third program impacts both your first and third chakra. This program’s #1 agenda is that it keeps the fear program running in your nervous system.

For example, many scenarios can trigger fear. Such as news about the end of the world scenarios or WW III. Evening news blasting news about economy crashing. Or the reality of the food prices going through the roof, can trigger any sane person into fear.

When our sense of safety is threatened, our body automatically goes into fear. And worse, we have no awareness that our nervous system has activated the fear response.

When fear becomes our default state of being, it creates inner violence & suffering.

The best antidote against this bug is to:

• befriend your nervous system,
• become aware of people, places, things, times & events that trigger fear.
• learn to regulate your Nervous System

These three programs/ bugs come preloaded in our chakras when we are born on this planet. And they continue to negatively impact us, until we address them.

Practical Steps for Healing Lower Chakras

Number One, Awareness is the Key. First step is to educate about the existence of these bugs & how they keep you stuck in negative thinking. 

Number Two, commit to observing & inquiring the source of your thoughts & behaviors. Reflect on where are your thoughts stemming from? Are you simply reacting or thinking through things?

Number Three, create a daily meditation practice to reclaim your body, mind & spirit.

Recap

• Learn about the three inbuilt programs in your Chakras. As they undermine your psychological & spiritual growth. Whilst keeping you mired in negative thinking.
• If you want a sovereign mind, then healing your Lower Chakras is non-negotiable.
• A dedicated self-inquiry process will raise your self-awareness. And it will help you shift out of negative mindset & patterns.

Additional Resources

Negative Ego & Personality: https://tinyurl.com/3kbkvut4

Facing sexual wounds: https://tinyurl.com/6hkcu7va

Sexual Misery: https://tinyurl.com/4kkpused

On Victim Victimizer Program: https://tinyurl.com/mryvcu5e

On Warring & Competition Program: https://tinyurl.com/bdhxmb7e

The following prayer-poem penned by Dr. Clarissa Estes, has been put forth at the United Nations, and presented during a tribal women’s coalition in South Africa, as well as carried into session at the parliament in the Netherlands, and given before U.S. Congressional hearings on welfare reform in the 1990s.

This poem, while written for women, is just as applicable to the suppression of the feminine voice – in both men & women.

How to Silence a Woman: Retrieving here Voice . . .

When someone says, “We’re saying the same thing.”
Say, “We are not saying the same thing.”

When someone says, “Don’t question, just have faith”
Say, “I am questioning vato, and I have supreme faith in what I think.”

When someone says, “Don’t defy my authority.”
Say, “There is a higher authority that I follow.”

When someone says, “Your ideas are seductive.”
Say, “No, my ideas are not seductive, they are substantial.”

When someone says, “Your ideas are dangerous”
Say, Yes, my ideas are dangerous, and why are you so afraid hombre o mujer?”

When it is said, “It’s just not done.”
Say. “It will be done.”

When it is said, “It is immature”
Say, “All life begins small and must be allowed to grow.”

When it is said, “It’s not well thought out.”
Say, “It is well thought out.”

When they say, “You’re over-reacting.”
Say, “You’re under-reacting vato.”

When they say, “You’re being emotional.”
Say, “Of course I have well placed emotions, and by the way, what happened to yours?”

When they say, “You’re not making any sense.”
Say, “I don’t make sense, I am the sense.”

When they say, “I can’t understand you when you’re crying.”
Say. “Make no mistake, I can weep and be fierce at the same time.”

When they say, “I cant understand you when you’re being so angry.”
Say. “You couldn’t hear me when I was being nice, sweet or silent, either.”

When someone says, “You’re missing the point.”
Say, “I’m not missing the point, but you seem to be missing my point— What are you so afraid of?”

When someone says, “You are breaking the rules.”
Say, “Yes, I am breaking the rules.”

When someone says, “That’s not practical.”
Say, “It’s practically a done deal, thank you very much.”

When it is said, “No one will do it, believe you, follow it.”
Say, “I will do it, I will believe in it, and in time, the world may well follow it.”

When it is said, “No one wants to listen to that.” 
Say, “I know you have a hard time listening to that.”

When it is said, “It’s a closed system, you cant change it.”
Say, “I’m going to knock twice and if there is no answer, then I am going to blow the doors off that system and it will change.

When it is said, “They’ll ignore you.”
Say, “They won’t ignore me and the 100s of thousands who stand with me.

When they say, “It’s already been done.”
Say, “It’s not been done well enough.”

When they say, “It’s not time yet.”
Say “It’s way past time.”

When they say, “It’s not the right day, right month, right year.”
Tell them, “The right year was last year, and the right month was last month, and the right day was yesterday, and you’re running behind schedule vato, and what in the name of God and all that is holy are you going to do about it?”

When they say, “Who do you think you are?”— tell them who you are… and don’t hold back.

When they say, “I put up with it, you’ll have to put up with it too.” Say, “No, no, no,no.”

When they say, “I’ve suffered a long time and you’ll have to suffer too.” Say, “No, no, no,no.”

When they say, “You’re an incorrigible, defiant, hard to get along with, unreasonable woman, Say, “Yes, yes, yes, yes,

and I have worse news for you yet—

We are teaching our daughters,
our mothers, 
and our sisters…

We are teaching our sons 
our fathers, 
and our brothers

to be just like us.

About Clarissa Estes

Clarissa Pinkola Estés is an American poet, psychoanalyst and post-trauma specialist who was raised in now nearly vanished oral and ethnic traditions. Estés is a first-generation American writer and Jungian psychoanalyst. She is the author of Women Who Run with the Wolves.

Dr. C.P. Estés’ is a lifelong activist in service of the voiceless; as a post-trauma recovery specialist and psychoanalyst of 48 years clinical practice with the persons traumatized by war, exiles and torture victims; and as a journalist covering stories of human suffering and hope.

Poem Credit

Clarissa Pinkola Estés, How to Silence a Woman: Retrieving her Voice

Clarissa’s Work: 

Women who Run with the Wolves: https://tinyurl.com/23dtnzkb

Dangerous Old Woman: https://tinyurl.com/5n8p49j9

Untie the Strong Woman: https://tinyurl.com/5n8wc5th

Joyous Body: https://tinyurl.com/2jteu3mc

Introduction

Do your fears stop you from moving forward? Do you feel stuck in a survival mode? Are you always moving homes and lack stability in life? Do you struggle with feelings of not enough?

If you said yes to any of the above questions, you might have a blocked Root Chakra. In this blog post, I will share practical tips on healing & balancing your Root Chakra.

The Necessary Ingredient for Root Chakra Healing

Before we deep dive into the work of Root Chakra healing, know that the #1 ingredient you need for your journey is your feelings. You can’t touch, feel, or see your chakras. Your feelings are the only way to get present to chakras & their intelligence.

Feelings are generally not straightforward. What you think and feel about a situation can be diametrically opposite. You could live in a mansion & still feel poor inside. You could have a million dollars in the bank and still not feel enough. You could be a CEO and still feel insecure with those lower in the ladder rung. In all these examples, your feelings get you present to how you perceive the world around you.

If your goal is to heal your Root Chakra, then you want to leave your intellect at the door & step into the world of your feelings. You will quickly learn that chakra healing is not an intellectual process.

Functioning of Root Chakra

The Root Chakra is located at the base of the spine in the physical body. It is connected with feeling safe & secure, at a psychological level.

The human body has different auric layers. The first layer of the aura houses the Root Chakra, is also called the Etheric body.

The level of mind connected with this Etheric layer (and hence the Root Chakra) is the Subconscious mind, which acts as a hard drive of all your experiences, from this life, and other lifetimes.

How do you know if your Root Chakra is blocked?

The Subconscious mind keeps track of all of your memories, especially those of abuse, shock, trauma, and devastation, not just from your current life but also from other lifetimes.

These memories make themselves known through your chronic fears. If a fear shows up repeatedly, there’s usually a story attached to it. Say you died in a plane crash in your past life (a trauma experience). Perhaps, in your current life, you have a fear of heights or a fear of traveling in planes. This is partly how the past painful memories impact you.

Whenever your physical body is holding onto trauma, it colors how you think. Chances are, you tend to see life through the lens of either a victim or a victimizer.

Trauma memories also tend to polarize how you think and process information. You tend to label circumstances as good or bad, positive or negative, higher or lower, rich or poor, and so on. In other words, you think in terms of extremes (think black & white) & usually, there’s no middle ground.

You can become conscious of your thinking patterns by cultivating self-awareness, and become present to the contents stored in your Subconscious mind.

How to visualize your Root Chakra

An excellent visual for the Root Chakra is to imagine the deep, penetrating roots of a giant Oak tree.

Using this analogy, reflect on the areas where you don’t feel grounded. Where are you not standing in your full power? Perhaps there are areas where you are seeking external love, validation, and even acceptance. Again, it’s a feeling question and not an intellectual one. So you want to get present to the painful pockets in your consciousness & work towards shifting the dynamics in these situations to heal your Root Chakra.

How you build a strong foundation?

Healing your Root Chakra usually involves building a sturdy base foundation. A couple of suggestions:

Number One, learn how to work through your Fears. That is, acknowledging your fears and taking time to FEEL them without disowning them. When your body holds on to fear, your nervous system becomes dysregulated. Learning to soothe & calm your nervous system is paramount.

In my experience, one of the best ways to heal your fears is by #1 Naming them & then second, identifying their root cause

Another suggestion for healing your Root Chakra is to get present in areas where you don’t feel enough. Where are these beliefs stemming from? Confront them so you can change them for good.

Number three, learn to establish healthy boundaries. Work on building your self-esteem so that you have your back in all situations.

The next suggestion is to actively address your beliefs around insecurity, self-alienation, and lack of safety & security. Confronting situations where you are not self-assertive or when your inner critic takes over. These belief systems will weaken your Root Chakra.

Characteristics of an Overactive and Underactive Root Chakra

An integral part of healing the Root Chakra involves understanding when this chakra becomes underactive or overactive.

When the Root Chakra is underactive or blocked, you tend to see life through the lens of a victim. Your predominant thought patterns are thoughts of survival, feeling unsafe, or feeling disconnected from the material world.

An overactive Root Chakra manifests as bully/ bullying energy. You tend to have an intimidating energy. And your predominant thoughts are still colored with fears of survival and not feeling safe & secure.

Ideally, you want your Root Chakra to be in balance. Neither too open nor blocked.

Reasons why the Root Chakra becomes blocked?

There are two key reasons that add to imbalanced in the Root Chakra. First is false beliefs around safety & security that get passed on through the generations. The second is embodying distorted masculine energies.

False sense of safety & security

In our culture, what we are taught about security means more money, a big house, and material possessions. You can have a billion dollars in your bank account and still feel insecure. Your ultimate security comes from trusting god & spirit. It comes from knowing that your supply is limitless.

Wounded Masculine Energies

Regardless of your gender, you have both masculine & feminine energy inside yourself. When the masculine energy becomes predominant, we call that wounded masculine.

Your biological father is the first introduction of masculine energy in your life. Your early interactions with your father forms the blueprint of your masculine energies. If you didn’t receive adequate love & nurturing, then it is highly likely your masculine energies have become distorted or wounded.

Across most cultures around the world, men are taught from a young age to gain power & control, to deny or minimize emotions, or to use intimidation or bullying to get their way. Some religions even normalize violence. Recognize that such beliefs are passed down from one generation to another.

Reflect on your relationship with your biological father, and ask yourself which aspects of that relationship weren’t peaceful? What did you wish was different about your relationship? What are the things you didn’t receive as a child? And most importantly, how can you give those things to yourself?

Because as you start healing the dynamics in this relationship, the inner masculine & feminine energies will come into balance. And you’ll correct the imbalances in your Root Chakra.

Practical steps to heal the Root Chakra

• Actively working on addressing any pain, fear, or trauma you have experienced in this life. So you can go beyond it & learn to trust yourself and others again.
• Learning to balance your masculine & feminine energies. This includes inner child healing and healing the relationship dynamics with the primary male figure in your life. You must also commit to bringing your emotions into neutrality.
• Cultivating harmony within & with others. So that you don’t feel threatened/ bullied, or victimized by others.
• Changing your belief system so you are not looking for safety & security in material things but in your connection with god & spirit.
• Consciously developing virtues of goodness that guide the way in your life. These could include virtues of Purity, Generosity, Patience, Kindness, Discipline/Conservation, Diligence, and Humility.
• Consciously working with the positive polarity thought forms of love, safety, gratitude, abundance, ease, and connection with the spirit and material world so you build an inner sense of safety & security.

Additional Resources

• GSF Behavior: https://tinyurl.com/mrsf4wz8
• The tree of life: https://tinyurl.com/3922fnrm 
• About Root Chakra: https://tinyurl.com/6ac7cn43
• First chakra: https://tinyurl.com/34mzzvvv
• Three Layers of Ego: https://tinyurl.com/52k8huc5
• Internal Structure of Ego: https://tinyurl.com/2p9rrey6

Introduction

Have you recently had a heart opening? Are you feeling drunk in love? Are you experiencing an overdose of happiness, love, ecstatic all at the same time?

Congratulations! This ‘bliss state’ often marks the first phase of unblocking the Heart Chakra.

What follows the ‘Bliss State,’ is the Dark Night of the Soul. While the first phase feels light, uplifting, expansive, and almost addictive. In contrast, the second phase is dark, gloomy & depressive.

In this article, you’ll learn how to heal your Heart Chakra without getting stuck in the Bliss state.

Two Distinct Phase of Healing Heart Chakra

Unblocking the Heart Chakra entails two distinct phases. Most people don’t register or acknowledge this fundamental fact. They equate heart opening with love & light.

Clinging to the ‘bliss state’ is the quintessential rookie mistake. If you reject anything that feels heavy or uncomfortable, you are bound to get stuck in the bliss trap.

During the Dark Night of the Soul, you’ll feel sad, remorse & miserable. You’ll likely get triggered over the small stuff. Your feelings will get hurt. The second phase is ‘dark’ for a reason.

Majority of us are not taught how to embrace our uncomfortable feelings. We usually tend to reject the negative feelings bubbling to the surface. And try to latch on to & recreate the bliss state, either with weed or addiction or finding a new partner.

The dance between bliss & despair derails most people from their spiritual growth & integration.

In my heart opening phase, I became addicted to meditation. In retrospect, my obsession with spiritual growth & evolution was a disguise for escapism.

I believed if I meditated long hours, everything in my life would magically work itself out. I can laugh about it today, but not too long ago, that’s how I operated.

The truth is, I had become ensnared in the Bliss Trap & worse, was unaware of it.

The Purpose of the Dark Night of the Soul during Heart Opening

The Dark Night of the Soul is a legit phase in the spiritual journey, and none of us can bypass it.

It serves a greater purpose, of ensuring your spiritual maturity.

At some point in your healing journey, you have to learn to

• Take accountability for your behavior,
• Take responsibility for your life & the quality of your relationships,
• Learn to go beyond surface level emotions,
• Become emotionally balanced & develop a strong mind.

These attributes together made your spiritual body strong, resilient & mature.

When you strengthen your spiritual body, you experience divine love.

What happens to Emotions before & during the Dark Night of the Soul?

The two chakras connected with your emotions are the Second & the Fourth Chakra.

Second Chakra = Sacral Chakra = Called the Lower Emotional Body = Home of Lower Emotions.

Fourth Chakra = Heart Chakra = Called the Higher Emotional Body = Home of Higher Emotions.

Lower Emotions include:

• Addiction / Lust,
• Wrath / Rage / Vengeance,
• Greed / Avarice,
• Envy / Jealousy,
• Gluttony / Waste,
• Laziness / Discouragement,
• Pride / (+/-) Self-Importance

Higher emotions include:

• Unconditional Love,
• Joy,
• Forgiveness,
• Kindness,
• Compassion,
• Gratitude

Before the heart opening, the emotional pain in humans is anchored in the second chakra. You are usually unaware of the pain and act it out in your relationships.

During the Dark Night of the Soul, your emotional pain moves from the Sacral Chakra to the Heart Chakra. You start becoming conscious of your emotional pain, and at some level, can no longer deny how you feel.

Until you have opened & healed your heart, one doesn’t know what love is.

In relating to others, we confuse love with lust (which operates out of the Sacral Chakra).

In the beginning stages of your heart chakra opening, consider a simple exercise. See if you can discern if you are experiencing emotions out of the Second Chakra or the Heart Chakra.

To unblock your heart chakra, you must bring the pain stored in the second chakra up into the 4th chakra. And dissolve it through unconditional love & forgiveness.

The REAL Reason the Heart Chakra becomes Blocked

The key reason why so many of us live our lives with our hearts closed is heart wounds.

Your heart can become wounded for many reasons, including:

• Previous trauma,
• Pain suffered in childhood,
• Accumulated emotional issues from other lifetimes,
• Our physical bodies also carry core wounds from being born on planet Earth.

Core wounds are abandonment, betrayal, and lack of trust, fear, cosmic rage & unworthiness. How these wounds play out in your life depends on your upbringing, your soul mission & so on.

The bottom line is we all carry wounds in our heart. When you deny or disown these emotional wounds, you close your heart. And you act from a place of woundedness & fear.

A wounded heart is a traumatized heart. Think of a feral cat. She only knows survival.

She has no reference of love, nurture, caring, and belonging. So it’s no surprise why she acts the way she does.

Similarly, a wounded heart becomes cold, cunning, cruel & calculative.

Tending to Physical vs. Emotional wounds

When a person has physical heart ailments, they make it a point to see a doctor.

They believe if they take medicines, they will find relief.

Do you tend to your emotional wounds like your physical wounds?

Where do you go when your heart is emotionally injured? What meds do you take to heal the ‘abandonment’ or ‘betrayal wound’?  Denying the existence of the emotional wounds doesn’t make them disappear.

Practical Steps to Healing the Heart Chakra

Here’s a list of practical steps you can take to heal your heart chakra.

Suggestion #1

Number one is tapping into the sensation of ‘warmth,’ which is like god’s food for a traumatized heart.

Warmth can include spending time, energy & money on things that warm your heart. It means hanging out with real people who nourish your soul.

The two big enemies of warmth are: Conformity & Complacency. So you want to be mindful that they don’t sneak up on you.

Suggestion #2

Number two is find people with whom you feel a heart resonance. That is, people with whom you don’t have to put up defenses.

Suggestion #3

When the heart is wounded, it’s packed to the brim with pain. Consider creating tiny pockets of breathing space.

Where your heart can breathe deeply, and relax. Overtime, these tiny pockets add up, creating more space & openness in your heart.

Suggestion #4

If you want to unblock your heart chakra, you will need to face any buried and unresolved pain in the second chakra. This means, facing your shadow, and addressing emotions of grief, sadness, and despair.

Suggestion #5

The mental matrix of the Third Chakra & the Heart Chakra are usually disconnected. That is, the Conscious mind is not aware of the contents of the Astral Mind & vice versa.

You can set intentions to restore communication between these chakras.

Suggestion #6

Unblocking the heart chakra means to devote yourself to learning how to be in love. You can’t love others unless you love yourself first.

The bravest thing you can do in your healing journey is to never forget what love feels like. That’s how you preserve the divine spark in your heart. And that’s how you unblock your heart chakra.

In Summary

To heal Heart Chakra,

• Don’t deny or disown your heart wounds & commit to healing them.
• Create tiny (atomic) moments of solace & comfort that offer relief to your Wounded Heart.
• Embrace warmth in all shapes and forms.
• Dare to know what pains your heart so you can transmute it.
• Learn how to be in love. First with yourself & then others.
• The bravest thing you can do is to never forget what love FEELS like.

Additional Resources

• Traumatized Heart – https://tinyurl.com/mrynv24x
• Healing our Heart – https://tinyurl.com/36cuerf4
• Male Heart Wound – https://tinyurl.com/yckk3a4n
• A 42 yr old follow-up of the Harvard Mastery of Stress Study on Perception of Parental Love by Linda Russell & Gary Schwartz – https://tinyurl.com/5bcnxnn4
• Soul Psychology – https://tinyurl.com/y5wc5r3b
• Multi-dimensionality – https://tinyurl.com/mvuduu7e
• Astral Bliss – https://tinyurl.com/3bjzwk7a
• Preserving our Heart – https://tinyurl.com/5t3r9kab

Books:

• Healing the War between the Genders (The Power of Soul-centered Relationships) by Linda Marks
• Touching (the Human Significance of Skin) by Ashley Montagu
• The Continuum Concept by Jean Liedloff

Introduction

Your predominant thoughts are a telltale sign of the workings of your lower chakras.

Want to know how a person thinks?

Simple.

Observe their behavior.

Your thoughts & behaviors go hand in hand. Both, in turn, shape your personality.

In the Chakra framework, the lower chakras (that is, Chakra 1, 2, and 3) form your personality matrix (or ego). In other words, how you think & behave is intimately tied and connected to the health of your lower chakras.

If the majority of your thoughts are negative, so is your behavior.  You are likely to have a big/toxic ego. Your positive thoughts feed into positive behaviors. If you have balanced your lower chakras, you are like to a healthy ego.

How do you change your default thinking patterns? Commit to healing your lower chakras.

The Core Reason for your Negative Thoughts

There are three mind matrices connected with the lower chakras. These are the Subconscious mind, the Instinctual Mind & the Conscious mind. Together, these three matrices are responsible for the quality of your thinking. So if you get struggle with fear or anxiety, then the lower chakras are what you need to work with.

Of the three mind matrices, we are only are somewhat aware of the Conscious Mind. That’s because we live in the third dimension (3D reality). 

The first step in healing your lower chakra is to cultivate self-awareness. Because that’s how you become aware of the content stored in the mind matrices. As you learn to quiet your mind, you will become present to how you think. You will become familiar with your emotional encumbrances, and coping mechanisms. Your addictive tendencies become glaringly obvious.

For example, overeating was how I dealt with feeling afraid, confused or vulnerable. Perhaps your choice of addiction looks different. The billion-dollar question to ask is Why the Addiction? Why we struggle with shame, guilt, fear, worry and other negative thoughts?

Dr. Gabor Mate says, Addiction is a response to Emotional pain. I’d go a step further & assert, Negative Thoughts as a response to Emotional Pain.

Where does your Emotional Pain stem from?

In the Chakra framework, Chakra 1 is the storehouse of your emotional memories. And Chakras 2 houses the emotional pain. The tragedy is we have zero awareness of the information stored in these two lower chakras.

Your emotional pain cam stem from varied experiences. For example,

• Having experienced abuse or trauma at a physical, mental, emotional & spiritual level.
• Having experienced heartbreak.
• Bad things happening. And also good things not happening.
• Issues connected with the second chakra. That is, relationships, emotions, intimacy, bonding, childhood pain & trauma.
• Issues connected with the base desires. That’s everything related to sex and sexual energy. Including themes of porn, strip clubs, and dating sex-hookup websites. When there’s misuse or abuse of your sexual energies, it adds to inner pain & disconnection.

Without awareness of emotional pain, you get stuck in negative thoughts & addictions.

Why Positive Thinking (alone) doesn’t work?

The first line of defense against negative thinking for most people is to think positive.

Do you go out of your way to be generous? Or have you become obsessed about discipline as a way to get a handle on your thinking? Or you try to be kind to random strangers. These strategies, while admirable, don’t offer permanent relief.

To get rid of your negative thoughts, you must commit to deep dive into your psyche.  You must commit to befriending your shadow.

If you struggle with chronic negative thinking, you are likely to have a bloated ego. People might nudge you to tame your ego. They’ll tell you to humble yourself, or to not brag about your success, or learn to put others first. These suggestions don’t work in the long run because they don’t address the source of causation.

Why you get stuck in your Negative Thoughts?

Do you struggle to get a handle on your negative thoughts? Overtime, chronic negative thoughts become permanent fixtures in your psyche. Like house guests that refuse to leave.

Everything you think or feel becomes colored by your negative thoughts. Once your negative thinking becomes hardwired, negative spirits can become attached to your aura.

Do you remember the Tuning Fork experiment from high school? In this experiment, a vibrating tuning fork makes sound, and causes other things to vibrate with the same frequency.

Using the tuning fork analogy, when your predominant thinking is negative, you magnetize negative situations towards yourself. As within, so without

What is Predator Mind Thinking?

Your hardwired negative thoughts and emotional pain make you think like a predator. Like a wild animal, a predator mind preys on the weak and vulnerable, instinctively. For example, domestic violence & child abuse is a manifestation of the predator mind.

The core ideology of the predator mind is that it’s superior to everyone else. So it plays out the Superiority complex of the polarity, and projects inferiority on others.

Without awareness, your inner pain & disconnection can manifest as untrustworthy behaviors. Such as lying, cheating, gas lighting, lack of empathy for self & others. Acting entitled, exploiting others and not respecting their boundaries.

How to heal your Unhealthy Ego?

Let’s discuss practical steps you can take to heal your unhealthy ego.

Solution #1:

Identifying the superior & inferior thinking in everyday life. Make an inventory of your thoughts and classify them as Inferior or Superior thoughts, Love thoughts or Fear thoughts.

Superior Thinking includes: Intolerance, Impatience, Arrogance, Manipulation, Attack, Anger, Judgmental thinking.

Inferior Thinking includes: Worry, Low Self Love or Esteem, Jealousy, Guilt, Hurt, Fear, Attachment, and Martyrdom.

Reflect on how do these thoughts serve you? What would it take to cultivate neutral mindset? The best antidote to the superiority complex is emotional & psychological centering.

Solution #2

Commit to addressing any & all repressed pain. Be it from your childhood or adult years.

Your emotional pain is the root cause of your negative thinking. You can’t escape this pain, not if your goal is to change your thinking & mindset. Healing your emotional pain will also contribute to healing your lower chakras.

Solution #3

Contemplate on the positive polarity thoughts. Such as, purity, generosity, patience, generosity, kindness, discipline and humility.

Often, reflection alone can nudge you to act and think in positive ways.

Gentle Reminder

To make headway with inner work, you’ll need to learn to quiet down your busy mind. If it feels supportive, consider cultivating a daily meditation practice.

Being angry, or judgmental, is a manifestation of the unresolved ego. It means more work needs to be done in the lower three chakras.

Healing your lower chakras takes time, effort, patience and devotion. So please be kind towards yourself. Healing the 3 lower chakras is like running a marathon. It is highly unlikely you can run 26 miles overnight. The same applies to healing your negative ego & your lower chakras.

In Summary

• Addiction is a response to Emotional Pain. Negative Thoughts are a response to Emotional Pain. If you heal your emotional pain, you are FREE.

• Emotional pain is Invisible. And we have zero awareness of it. Without self-discipline, your negative thoughts will become hardwired.

• Chronic Negative Thinking + Emotional pain makes you think like a predator. Predator Thinking feeds into the Superiority Complex

• If you want to heal your lower chakras, you must learn to slow down your busy mind and cultivate self-awareness.

Introduction

What’s the secret to maintaining healthy relationships? Why do relationships that start with the best intentions turn sour? Why do people become clingy, needy, and desperate in relationships?

The Chakra that is the home central of your relationships is the Sacral Chakra. And so, any imbalance in the Sacral Chakra will manifest as relationship issues.

Do you know your inner child is intertwined in all your relationships? When your inner child is wounded, the unaddressed pain will unequivocally color your relationships.

The ‘Love’ sculpture, made by Alexander Milov, was first featured in the 2015 Burning Man festival. It represents two humans at odds, but each has an inner child attempting to reconnect with each other.

How do you heal the pain in your relationships? That’s what this article will discuss.

The inner child work will help you change your relationship dynamics for the better. And it will also help in healing your sacral chakra.

Visual for the Sacral chakra

Imagine your Sacral Chakra’s structure resembles the internal layers of Earth. The four main layer of Earth’s structure are crust, mantle & the core.

Using this analogy, let’s say the outer layer of Earthrepresents emotions. The mantle represents relationships with others. The outer core represents sub-personalities & archetypes. And finally, the inner core of represents the inner child.

There are other themes connected with the sacral chakra. But for the context of this discussion, let’s stick with a basic model and visual.

What is Inner Child?

Your inner child is the child aspect inside you.And it forever stays with you, no matter which stage of life you are in. The inner child is usually associated with your spontaneity, creativity, intuition & curiosity. 

The inner child part includes all the stages of child’s life – from newborn to infant, toddler, preschooler, school age, teenager, and young adult.The first seven years are the most critical. This is when your core relationship patterns get formed.

Your inner childholds the blueprint of all your relationships. That includes how you relate to yourself, others, and members of the opposite sex.

What the Inner Child Needs to thrive?

Unlike animals, a human child can’t survive on their own.  So it makes most sense to talk about the inner child in the context of the parent-child relationship. Children are most vulnerable in the first seven years of their life because they are dependent on adults for their survival.

Like adults, children also have Physical, mental, emotional & spiritual needs. At a physical level, a child needs a safe house, enough food, and clothes so it can grow. At a mental level, a child needs access to books & education to grow at an intellectual level. At a spiritual level, a child needs a connection with the divine & higher power that can guide it through its life.

Let’s say growing up, you didn’t have enough toys, or books. Chances are you’ll have a visceral memory of things that were lacking; mainly because these are tangible things.

The Emotional Needs of Inner Child

The emotional needs encompass the need to be loved, seen & heard, acknowledged & validated. From a social standpoint, a child needs to know they belong to a family & community.

When the emotional needs go unmet, they are not easy to discern.

When the emotional needs go unmet, the inner child becomes wounded. Same for when a child experiences abuse or trauma, especially in the first 7 years.

What do these inner child wounds look like?

Abandonment, Lack of Trust, Guilt, Neglect, Rejection, Betrayal, Injustice, and the like.  

At an energetic level, these emotional wounds weigh you down. They keep you stuck at an unconscious level in destructive patterns and behaviors.

Abandonment wound colors the people you partner with and choose. You’ll likely to choose emotionally unavailable people. Or you’ll end up in codependent relationships.

When there’s an inner lack of trust, you’ll need a lot of external reassurance & validation. The guilt wound will ensure that you ‘feel’ that anything that goes wrong is your mistake. The neglect wound leads to low self-esteem. Together, these emotional wounds make you feel & act like a victim.

Inner Child & Relationship Blueprint

Your inner child holds the blueprint of your relationships. Including your self-relationship. And as you can imagine, this blueprint gets formed in the first seven years of your life.

When your inner child carries emotional wounds, the relationship blueprint becomes distorted. This is the key reason why you keep replaying old patterns in your partnerships.  

How the Inner child gets your attention?

Your wounded inner child gets your attention through:

• Through emotional dysregulation,
• By immaturely reacting in stressful situations
• By choosing unavailable partners,
• By putting on different personalities depending on the situation,
• And by creating chaos in your relationship. (both in familial and platonic relationships). 

Your inner child will go to all these lengths to meet its unmet emotional needs.

Case Study: Dr. Gabor Mate

Dr. Gabor Mate is a world-renowned expert on addiction. In his bestselling book ‘The Myth of Normal’ he shares a personal anecdote.

One time he was flying home to Vancouver from a business trip, and expecting his wife to pick him up from the airport. When his plane landed, he received a text, ‘Sorry! I haven’t left home. Do you still want me to come?’ He messaged back, ‘Never mind,’ and decided to a take a cab home.

Dr. Gabor shares how this insignificant event triggered him. So much so, he didn’t speak with his wife for the next 24 hrs. As you can imagine, this wound goes back to his childhood.

Dr. Mate was born in Hungary in 1944 during the World War II. When he was a year old, his mother gave him to a total stranger in the street. Because she didn’t know if she’d be alive the following day.

Dr. Gabor say this one incident birthed a deep sense of abandonment. Of not being wanted in the world.

He says, he doesn’t have a conscious memory of this event because the part of the brain that stores long term memories is not fully developed in babies. And yet, the emotional implicit memory of abandonment lives deep in him.

Big & Small Trauma of Inner Child

People often assume that the inner child work is for a select few. For those who have experienced abuse, violence, divorce or loss of a parent in their early life. Yes, these are traumatic events that you only wish no child has to experience.

But ordinary events that are less memorable but hurtful can be negative impact you.

For example, being bullied by your peers, or repeated harsh comments from a parent. Or the lack of emotional connection & attunement with nurturing adults.

These experiences are obviously not stressful & yet, can still cause disconnection. We never equate our emotional needs with air/water/food/shelter. But what-if our emotional needs were as important as our survival needs?

The Journey to healing the Inner Child

The journey to healing your inner child starts with befriending your emotions. Because that’s the only way your inner child can communicate with you. It can’t pick up a phone and explain why it’s hurting.

Where there’s charged memory, there you’ll find heightened emotions. When you deny your emotions, you are keeping the memory of painful experiences intact. Learning to work with your emotions is non-negotiable for inner work.

When I first started working through my emotions, the one emotion that came up the most was anger. And I often wondered if I had an anger problem. At that time, I wasn’t aware of the inner workings of Sacral Chakra. Turns out, I didn’t have an anger problem. I had a wounded inner child problem.

Wounded Inner Child and Dysregulated Nervous System

Children can’t fight with adults. There is no way a five-year-old can overpower a thirty-five-year-old.

When the instinctual response of fight or flight isn’t an option, what’s left is the freeze response. Their nervous system becomes frozen in time.

When the nervous system becomes dysregulated, it becomes challenging to stay present. Occupying the body means reconnecting with the old emotional wounds.

Most prefer to numb their pain with distractions. Including social media, porn, food, video games, etc.

Why Inner Child healing takes time?

Reconnecting with your inner child means reassuring the child part in you that you will not abandon, ignore, hurt, dismiss, or devalue him like his biological parents.

It is high likely you treat your inner child like your parents treated you. Yeah, that’ll have to change.

Spend time with your inner child. Shower him with unconditional love and your inner child will respond.

Reconnecting with Inner Child

• You connect with your inner child by doing things you enjoyed as a kid.
• Reflecting on your adult patterns and discerning your unmet emotional needs.
• By learning to re-parent your inner child. By ensuring your physical & emotional needs are always met. By learning to be kinder with yourself, especially on rough days.
• By engaging in activities where you get to express your emotions. For example, painting, singing, coloring, doodling, or playing an instrument can help you channel your emotions.
• If you are a beginner to the inner work, consider working with a Counselor or a Somatic therapist.

The Gifts of the Inner Child Healing

When you commit to healing your inner child, the quality of your relationships will exponentially improve. It will become easier to let go of dysfunctional people. You’ll find it effortless to communicate your wants & needs to others.

Best of all, you’ll get to experience healthy and progressive relationships with others.

You might wake up one day and realize, you were never the problem. Or you are not afraid anymore. And, most of all, you are worthy of the same love & kindness you show others.

A Gentle reminder

The best advice I could offer is healing your inner child is a feeling phenomenon. You can read thousands of books and educate yourself. And yes, that’s a great start. But implementation is where the runner meets the road.

Your inner child lives in the Sacral Chakra. The only language it understands is the language of emotions.

And this emotional work you can’t outsource. Only you can heal your soul and it begins with healing your inner child.

In Summary

• Your Sacral Chakra is the home of your relationships.
• Your Inner Child holds the blueprint of all your relationships. And it gets formed in the first seven years of your life.
• When the emotional needs go unmet in childhood years, your inner child becomes wounded.
• Healing your inner child means acknowledging the unmet childhood needs. Also, addressing any pain/trauma you might have experienced.
• When you commit to healing your inner child, your relationship dynamics will change. And so, you will also heal your Sacral Chakra.

Do you want to access higher chakras with ease & grace? Do you want to evolve spiritually? Are you committed to your personal growth & transformation? Are you willing to put in the inner work to cultivate a high self-esteem?

If you said yes to any of the questions, you must commit to healing your Lower Chakras.

The three lower chakras form your energetic foundation. When you have a strong foundation, you can easily weather the storms & the vagaries of life. You become like a magnificent oak tree that knows its place in the world.

Introduction

Working with the lower chakras, is like embarking on the hero’s journey. Once you say yes to the adventure, you go through a series of predictable events. Such as,

• Diving into the unknown (world of your psyche),
• Enduring a period of trials & tribulations,
• Discerning friends from foes,
• Slaying your demons, 
• Finding your treasure,
• And then you return home (as an evolved human).

The hero’s journey from start to finish is at the heart personal growth & transformation. And it also forms the foundation for healing your lower chakras.

What are the Lower Chakras?

The lower chakras are Charka 1, 2, and 3. That’s the Root Chakra, the Sacral Chakra & the Solar Plexus Chakra respectively. Together, these three chakras shape & color your human experience.

The mind matrices connected with the three lower chakras are the Subconscious mind, the Instinctual mind, and the Conscious mind. Collectively, these three matrices form your personality. As in who you think you are in the world. Another common synonym for personality is the ego.

Every single human on this planet has an ego. And that ego is made of three layers (Subconscious mind, the Instinctual mind, and the Conscious mind). Of these three layers, the conscious mind is what you are usually aware of – b/c you live in the 3d reality. But the other two mind matrices – not so much.

The First layer of the Ego

The first layer of your ego is your SC mind. It acts like a hard drive of all your experiences. From your first kiss to buying your first car to losing a loved one, every single memory of your life, good or bad, is stored on this hard drive. The happy memories are a non-issue but the unpleasant & painful ones often impact your downstream

The Second layer of the Ego

The second layer of your ego is your Instinctual mind – it’s the HQ of your instinctual drives & addictions.

Think of your instincts as that which you do w/o thinking. An example would be the instinctive drive to procreate or to soothe a crying baby. These Instincts are inbuilt. You are born knowing them.

Then there are learned instincts, which we pick up from our environment, especially during/ after unpleasant experiences. For example, a learned instinct would be to retract around a bully, after being beaten up at school. Or to minimize yourself around those who are more wealthy or successful. Or the instinct to dissociate when feeling overwhelmed. Or you become defensive if someone challenges your authority.

Between the ages of 0-7, a child’s brain isn’t completely developed. And thus, depends on its parents for its physical, mental, emotional & psychological growth. Say, during your childhood years, your home environment was less than peaceful. Chances are you likely developed unconscious instincts to protect yourself. And to this day, in moments of stress, you still might be acting out those responses.

The bottom line is that your ego’s #1 job is your survival. And if that means keeping you dissociated/numb/ stuck so you can function in the world & feel safe – then so be it. The only way to change your instinctual responses is by addressing the painful memories stored in this hard drive.

If for any reason these painful memories are not cleared, then at an unconscious level, you start putting up emotional walls. This is how you start shutting people out. When the pain stored in the subconscious mind is not cleared, your ego will create ego defenses to minimize this pain.

Over time, these emotional walls morph into persistent negative thoughts & emotions that you simply can’t brush off. Meaning when you engage with the world, your predominant feelings regardless of the situation are, unworthiness, shame, guilt, betrayal, enslavement, anger, etc.

The Third layer of the Ego

The third layer of your ego is your Conscious mind. This is generally – who you perceive as the self or a personality. If you pay attention to your thoughts, you’ll know which type of thoughts you entertain. Are those thoughts happy, sad, or depressive thought?

When you have built emotional walls, it also affects how you think. Your default thinking becomes colored with envy, jealousy, laziness, discouragement, greed, & the like. And this way of thinking is further bolstered when you judge yourself & others.

Thoughts & behaviors go hand in hand. When you struggle with negative thoughts, you are bound to struggle with negative behavior. If you over indulge in negative behaviors, a demonic spirit can attach itself to your aura. When you have too many negative thoughts & emotions, it is very easy for the mind to form addictions.

Case Study: Matthew Perry

Matthew Perry, the actor who played ‘Chandler Bing’ on Friends, struggled with a lifelong addiction to drugs & alcohol, something he candidly shared in his best-selling book, Friends, Lovers & the Big Terrible Thing.

Looking at Matthew’s life through the backdrop of the 3 layers of ego, at a conscious level, his behavior was telling of an addict. He couldn’t help but drink & take drugs even if that meant sabotaging his relationships, his career, and everything else in his life.

But how did Matt get this way? He sure wasn’t born an alcoholic. Then what triggered this behavior?

In his book, he shares many traumatic childhood incidents. For example, his parents divorced when he was only nine months old, and he felt his father had abandoned him & his mother.

Then at age 5, he flew from Canada to Los Angeles to see his father but did so, without any adult oversight. He share this event made wonder if he was alone.

When he was only a few days old and wouldn’t stop crying, his parent took him to a doctor who put him on Barbital (which is a narcotic & a sedative).

In addition, he talks about constantly having to fight for his mother’s attention. He shares feeling lonely as a child. Feeling as if his job was to entertain others & take care of others.

Now imagine all these painful memories, including the happy ones, of course, are stored in the first layer of his ego, his Subconscious mind.

Based on his childhood experienced, his core emotional wounds in the Instinctual mind – were abandonment & feeling unwanted & unloved. Perhaps, his early exposure to Barbital, primed his brain for addiction. But what flipped that addiction switch was the lack of emotional nurture growing up.

Throughout his book, Matt shares stories ranging from auditioning for Friends to dating Julia Roberts to filming with Salma Hayek and about the time he wanted to take on Tennis professionally. However, his emotional issues remain the same.

• I’m not enough.
• I am too needy.
• I need love but I don’t trust it.
• If I show you the real me, you might leave me.
• Before you can reject me, I will reject you.

It wasn’t until he addressed the painful memories (in Layer 1) that he found respite. But that relief came after decades of enduring physical, mental, emotional and spiritual abuse.

A lesson we can all learn from Matthew Perry’s life is, if we are to successfully tread the hero’s path, then we must get a handle on our addictions. Else they will constantly undermine our efforts for personal growth & evolution.

What constitues Addiction?

We generally tend to limit the scope of addiction to drugs, alcohol, food, and sex. But it is just as easy to become addicted to social media, fame, success, and money, plastic surgery, getting tattoos & even traveling. This list of addiction is endless in the 21^st century.

The Secret to healing your Lower Chakras

In our modern world, most of us are cut off from our feelings & emotions. But what happens when you lose the ability to feel? You can’t access the first two layers of your ego mind (Subconscious mind and Instinctual mind). In other words, you can’t get to the root cause of your pain & suffering.

This is also why people get stuck in their negative thoughts because the keys to their freedom are tucked away in the first two layers of their ego mind.

The hero’s journey through the underworld is about deep diving into the emotional realm. That’s how the hero gains awareness of the content stored in the first two layers of his ego mind. And so, if you want to complete this journey, you must make your emotions your allies.

Perhaps the billion-dollar advice I could share to heal the lower chakras is that anytime you encounter negative thoughts, beliefs, emotions, or behaviors, ask yourself, but why?

• But why do I think this way? Feel this way?
• But why do I sabotage my efforts?
• But why do I reject people?

Finding the answer to these questions is at the heart of healing the lower chakras.

Personal Experience with healing Lower Chakras

When I first learned about chakras, I was awe-struck by the higher ones & don’t judge me, but felt disdain for the lower ones. I so badly wanted my higher chakras to fully open. Because I thought it would put an end of my suffering. It’d magically resolve all my problems.

In retrospect, what I really wanted was to find ways to escape my reality. As you can imagine, my delusional thinking didn’t last long.

Because after years of a consistent meditation practice, I couldn’t fathom why:

• I still had deep self-esteem issues,
• I struggled in my relationships,
• And I didn’t know how to handle my intense emotions.

The truth is opening your higher chakras doesn’t exempt you from your responsibilities. You still have to live on this planet, pay your bills & interact with the systems set up here.

Learning to work with the lower chakras has been one of the most fulfilling and humbling experiences in my life so far.

In Wrapping up,

The lower chakras form our energetic foundation. And if your foundation is weak, you won’t be able to sustain higher levels of consciousness.

Think of your lower chakras as the foundation of a skyscraper. The taller the building, the deeper & stronger the foundation it needs. For example, the Petronas Towers in Malaysia are 452m high. And guess what? Its foundation is 120 m deep. That’s roughly 26% of its height.

I hope by now you realize the importance of healing your lower chakras, not just for personal growth but also building your energetic foundation.

Additional Resources

• Personality Matrix: https://tinyurl.com/bbv6vhz6
• On the 3 layers of ego: https://tinyurl.com/mve5pc6b
• Dissolving the 3d Personality: https://tinyurl.com/ms6dh4d6
• PTSD in Combat Veterans: https://tinyurl.com/uf374mjz

Videos to Watch

• On healing the Root Chakra: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wln0KTqGKhc
• On healing the Scaral Chakra: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbZIh7OdBHY
• On healing the Solar Plexus Chakra: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znnxL5DAkLU