Do you struggle with prioritizing things in your life? Do you fear making wrong choices and decisions? Feel the need to be doing ‘something’ to feel fulfilled and don’t know what it is? Do you secretly feel like giving up on your job/marriage/work? Chances are, if you said yes to any of the questions above, you might lack clarity on your core values.
Consider a hypothetical scenario. If you were to choose between a bag of gold vs. a bag of joy, chances are you might be tempted to opt for gold, even if what you value is Joy. How does one identify what is it that they truly value on the inside? Read on to learn more.
Why Values matter?
A few months ago, I came across a book titled ‘YouMap,’ authored by the LinkedIn Legend, Kirstin Sherry. Thanks to this book, I understood, perhaps for the first time, why you need to know your core values, and why you Must align your work & life around them.
At the most basic level, your values define who you are.
Your core values dictate your motivating behaviors and actions.
Want to know why you think or act the way you do? Look at your values. They will tell you why.
As an example, say one of your core values is authenticity. Perhaps you believe that all relationships must be grounded in authentic communication. But when you don’t speak up your mind with your friends and family, you might feel disappointed in yourself. Or maybe you value kindness. You jump at the chance to help other people, and you’re generous in giving your time and resources to worthy causes. Those are just two examples of personal values out of many.
Values & fulfillment
In the book ‘You Map,’ the author Kristin says, that if you want to know your values, take time to reflect on your life’s experiences when you were happiest or most fulfilled? What thing/ activity were you engaged in? What did engaging in that activity provide you? Let’s say you were your happiest when you were playing the Piano. Now ask yourself, what did playing Piano offer that you valued most? Was it Creativity? Beauty? Pleasure? Or something else? You can also identify your values by reflecting upon behaviors that inspire you. What do you deem as important in life? If money weren’t an issue, what would you do and why? Your answers here will reflect what you value most.
As you contemplate your life’s experiences, make a list of 5-10 core values that speak most to you. Everyone has their own personal values, and they can be quite different. There are over 200 values that you can choose from. If you Google ‘List of Common personal Values’ in the search bar, you will readily get this list. Alternatively, you can download a list of top 50 personal values here.
How to Identify your Top Values?
List your top 5 –10 values, and prioritize them. Say your top values include Honesty, Health, Kindness, Service, Adventure, and Growth. If adventure is your #1 value, then a trip to Alaska or the Amazon forest might rank higher in your priority list than volunteering or going to the gym. If Health is your #1 value, then perhaps, working out and being fit might precede all other endeavors.
Your #1 value dictates what’s most important to you and hence, why you ‘value’ it the most.
Take time to prioritize your top 5–10 values. Score each value on your list and keep going until you end up with a final order that makes sense to you.
When you prioritize your values, you will clearly understand what is most important to you in your life and why. Then you can align your life around those key values. Needless to add, you will naturally find yourself living a meaningful life.
There will be no ambiguity in your decisions. You will know exactly why you say yes to some things and no to others.
Best of all, you will find yourself investing your time and energy in activities that bring you the most joy.
Incorporating Values in my life
I have to admit that ‘YouMap’ quite literally changed my life. I saw firsthand how living a life in sync with your core values brings out the best in you and aligns you with your soul. As I zeroed down on my core values, I was not surprised to find that my #1 value is Spirituality; it made perfect sense.
In the past few years, every time I hit rock bottom, I would ask myself – if I had to strip away everything from my life and keep one thing – what would that be? And the answer was always – my meditation practice.
The beauty of hitting rock bottom is that you get honest with yourself. When your life is hanging by a thread, you cut through your BS pretty quickly.
I always knew that my Spirituality was important to me, and yet, I never related to it as my #1 value or value around which I needed to build my work and life. Thanks to my newfound clarity, I immediately started incorporating my Spirituality into my daily work. I started experiencing a level of satisfaction and fulfillment that I didn’t know was possible. Knowing my values also helped me to commit to a consistent practice of meditating 2 hours each day, a habit that I had struggled to keep up with for many years.
The gifts of living a life aligned with your core values are truly endless. Your life will become simple, easy, and effortless. You will be able to show up as your most authentic self in all aspects of your life. You will get to experience a heightened sense of happiness, creativity, and synchronicity. Work will feel effortless as you choose to devote time to what’s a natural extension of who you are. Joy will likely become your default state of being. Who wouldn’t want to tap into that? Right?
Summary
You deserve to live your best, most fulfilling, awe-inspiring life. If dissatisfaction has seeped in your life, then commit to identifying your top 5 values. Is your life aligned with your core values? If not, what can you do to sync them up?
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Link: You can get a copy of ‘YouMap’ here